Taboo Topics

{{SURPRISE!!!}} We are sexual beings and have been created to experience the love of God through a sexual relationship. Yup, even singles feel this. Everything about God is a corporate effort. WE are the church. WE are the body of Christ as 1 Corinthians 12: 12-14 says, “Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ."

...and TWO shall become one as in Genesis 2:24, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” WE are one with Christ as He is one WITH the father.

Taboo Topics

It is an ingrained beauty within us to be INTERDEPENDENT WITH EACH OTHER. SEX (there, I have said it…SEX), is an interdependent activity for the pleasure of the married couple. ORGASM (ooo, I said that too, it's even more taboo), is the culmination and the bonding element of sex. It bonds us to another in unity. UNLESS IT IS DISTORTED. While in fantasy world boy gets girl, girls are princesses and frogs turn to princes... all with just a kiss.

In real life, in our world here in 2013, that is not the case usually (unless of course you have been raised in a closet or secret garden by elves). We know what sex is and our bodies wake up to sexual feelings around the same age they did in the bible. Nowadays, adolescence is extended into our 20’s (and some longer), so we have to postpone sexual activity and satisfaction much later until we are married...if we are to follow the Lord’s will. Some people get married early and others get married much later. Some of us have never been married. However; we are meant to maintain self-control even when the world tells us it is not natural.

MASTURBATION is a narcissistic activity for the pleasure of one and not for the pleasure of the couple that is one in Christ. It is inherently creating the sexual gift of orgasm to be a gift while NEVER NEEDING THE PARTNER THAT GOD INTENDED IT TO HAVE.

Orgasm is the culmination of a married couple allowing their bodies to please each other, as God intended. It was created to be a gift of two people together, not a gift of individualism. It bonds a married couple together. Everything in our journeys with Christ is about us being together and working together and becoming one with Christ. IT IS NOT ABOUT OUR PLEASING OURSELVES FOR OURSELVES.

Masturbation allows you to become Narcissus. In the ancient Greek myth, Narcissus fell in love with his own image. He only needed himself and became obsessed with that. That is the risk of masturbation. You rule out relationship. You can damage our ability to have and create relationship in marriage. You can place another obstacle within a marriage by its practice.

I understand that world. Many experiences in life can wake children up to sex before they even understand relationship. Sexual abuse, exposure to excessive sexualized images when young, exposure to pornography, and many other things can cause a child’s body to wake up sexually before they understand where it fits into God’s plan. That introduces sexual pleasure without mature understanding of relationship. I have had such a life.

My battle over the years with God on my side has been to restore my willingness to open up my heart, trust others in community and to let my body and soul be a matched set and “sold” together, so to speak. They are meant to be given together in relationship and not to be separated.

You may learn somewhere along the way that sexual pleasure and relationship could be two different things. A relationship and even a marriage could exist without sex, but our bodies crave sexual pleasure naturally, as they were created to do. So, what if husband and wife could not have sexual relations? Then our bodies crave the sexual pleasure outside of the relationship.

Masturbation separates sexual stimulation and pleasure from relationship, experiencing the God given gift of orgasm without the God intended relationship of marriage. In essence, you steal the gift out of its intended matched set. You distort what God intended. That is sin.

Masturbation is addictive. You are not meant to function sexually alone or outside of marriage. Relationships, truly God-given relationships, are what HE intended. If you can get all of my needs met outside of God's intentional relationships, then you won’t pursue the community of Christ’s church as you were born again to do.

You have been given gifts to share, but hunger to have someone come and rescue them from you rather than to freely offer them to others in the body of Christ. Narcissism allows you to be guarded and to fear transparency with others. It allows you to create a world where you are all that is needed.

Masturbation is narcissism sexually but also does other damage. There is power in the one flesh union of marriage. 1 Corinthians 6:13-17 says: “The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. By his power God raised the Lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.”But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit."

When you have sex outside of marriage relationship, you unite with the person you are not covenanted with and you damage our one-spirit union with God. (the book of Hosea identifies us as the prostitute bride that is rebellious and seeks to bond with others besides God).

When you masturbate, you damage our spiritual relationship and one-spirit union with God by creating a singular union with your own flesh and placing sexual orgasmic pleasure above the desire of your partner who is Jesus. As singles we could do damage to a marriage we one day look forward to, our relationship with Jesus and as a married person, you could separate your one flesh union by seeking to only please yourself. Even if the fantasy used is about your spouse, it doesn’t really include them.

I believe that the Lord is sad when we miss out on what HE intended for what we ourselves create to replace it.


GET HELP: If you struggle with pornography or any sexual addiction, get help. XXXChurch is a great place to start with online help, but please seek a biblical counselor, too.

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